Nov 30
Snail Slime Facial, Anyone?
On another one of my loooonely singles nights * snort * I was flipping the channels. Dutch TV is filled with all kinds of shopping channels, like I am sure is true for most of your TV channels as well…
One of them was featuring something that totally made me gag. It was selling “Ellezza”. It supposedly is a “revolutionary facial skincream which heals, feeds, moisturizes and protects the skin against aging” and was manufactured based upon “many years of research and the global progress in the science of skincare”. It has snail slime extract in there… Yeah, I DID justs say that… You heard it right: SNAIL SLIME EXTRACT!!!
O . M . F . G . !!!
Apparently snales have the ability to regenerate themselves when wounded. The secret of the snale’s regenerating ability is the substance allantoine. A snale produces this substance by itself and scientist have succeeded in distilling this from substance and added it to this revolutionary new facial skincream…
Eeewwww!!! Double Eeeewwww!!! Triple Eeeeewwww!!!
There is NO WAY I am putting anything with any snale slime, snale extract, snale muck or whatever snale related substances or snale parts on my delicate face!!! Isn’t it bad enough they are performing sexual acts on my coffee table when I am out? Shiiittt!!!
I tried it. Its tingly but my boyfriend hates my new shell.