The Dutch Files

Nov 28

Island Life - Day 3 - half way evaluation

Hours of sleep:
Sunday: 6
Monday: 5
Tuesday: 4.5

Hours of work, no play:
Sunday: 16
Monday: 17
Tuesday: 17

Time wake up call:
Sunday: 07.00
Monday: 07.00
Tuesday: 06.30

Use of facilities bridal suite (jacuzzi / sauna):
Sunday: none
Monday: none
Tuesday: none

Alcohol intake:
Sunday: 3 red wine / 1 red port
Monday: 1 white wine / 2 red wine / 4 red port
Tuesday: 2 white wine / 3 Glenfiddich whiskey (no water, no ice)

Times tripping over pheasant outside hotel:
Sunday: none
Monday: none
Tuesday: once*

*before intake of 4 Glenfiddich, ’twas the fucking pheasants fault!

Number of men trying to get it on:
Sunday: 4
Monday: 4
Tuesday: 6

Number of men actually man enough to see it thru:
Sunday: 0
Monday: 0
Tuesday: 0

New words learned:
Sunday: -
Monday: -
Tuesday: merkin

Number of days to go: 3

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19 Dutch Treats to “Island Life - Day 3 - half way evaluation”

1. Catalinon 28 Nov 2007 at 9:32 am

   Hang in there!!!!!

2. AndiMACon 28 Nov 2007 at 1:05 pm

   Oh Dutchie, you need to get in that Jacuzzi STAT!

3. Blogaritaon 28 Nov 2007 at 1:08 pm

   LOL! I learned the word “merkin” a few years ago when some radio DJs were joking about it. How’d you learn it?

4. metalmomon 28 Nov 2007 at 1:29 pm

   A merkin is no laughing matter. I once had need of one after an unfortunate accident involving a match, a fart, and a glass of whiskey!

   Just kidding- Get in that Jacuzzi!!!

5. DutchBitchon 28 Nov 2007 at 2:01 pm

   Catalin: I will!

   AndiMac: I did, this morning

   Blogarita: How else than from my raunchy minded boss?

   Metalmom: Well, my glasses of whiskey had nothing to do with the new knowledge of “merkin” fortunately, LOL

6. buffalodickdyon 28 Nov 2007 at 2:01 pm

   Definition of “merkin”; An Amerkin who goes to bed at 930PM at an out of town seminar! Honestly, with everyone shaving down there, who’d buy a wig?

7. DutchBitchon 28 Nov 2007 at 2:10 pm

   Buff: Exactly my thoughts! Who would want one anyway?

8. Mr Fabulouson 28 Nov 2007 at 3:03 pm

   Now I need to go look up “merkin”…

9. Robinon 28 Nov 2007 at 3:31 pm

   Why would one need a merkin I wonder…

10. Jenon 28 Nov 2007 at 3:37 pm

    3 more days, only 3, focus now!

11. DutchBitchon 28 Nov 2007 at 4:28 pm

    Fab: It’s why I put the link in there, hon, especially for you

    Robin: Me too, and do you take it off at night? And how do you attach it? And does it come in a variety of colors? Is there a special holiday one?

    Jen: Focussing is getting increasingly hard for “some” reason…

12. Severityon 28 Nov 2007 at 7:46 pm

    if I could stop myself from pissing myself laughing I would say… ohhh poor baby.. but no I will say SUCK IT UP BITCH… LOL

13. Nanukon 28 Nov 2007 at 8:05 pm

    Nothing says “hangover” quite like 4 port after midnight (presumably) followed by 5 hours of sleep. I’d be hitting the Glenfiddich for breakfast!

14. MisstressMon 28 Nov 2007 at 9:40 pm

    Ehhhmmm…princes….Dutchy…love…..are you sure you are drinking enough?

15. Tugon 29 Nov 2007 at 1:45 am

    Seriously, there ARE such things as merkins? DAMN. Learn something new every day.

16. JQon 29 Nov 2007 at 1:54 am

    If you’re not wearing a merkin, than you are going to be jerkin’.

    I just had to say what everyone else was thinking.

17. Cinnkittyon 30 Nov 2007 at 4:28 am

    ha..ha..ha… “fucking pheasants fault” ha…ha..ha….!!!!

18. Turnbabyon 30 Nov 2007 at 5:40 am

    LMAO @ merkin

    Sugar you’ve gotta be more specific–how the heck did that com up??

19. DutchBitchon 02 Dec 2007 at 3:56 pm

    Severity: Well, at least I shared all the good stories with ya!

    Nanuk: I was thinking along the same lines

    MisstressM: Not sure, whaddayouthink?

    Tug: Apparently there are…

    JQ: Honestly… I think you are more of a jerkin WHEN you are wearing a merkin…

    CinnKitty: It’s true! It IS!!!

    Turnbaby: If you knew the way my boss’ mind works, you’d know that that could’ve come up in any possible conversation… He’s crazy like that…

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