Hi, it’s me, Dutchiestyle and I am guest posting for my wonderful friend Dutch Bitch today while she’s off gallivanting on Schiermonnikoog. I think I spelled that corrrectly. Who knows. But even if I didn’t, it’s not like anyone will notice…well except for Dutchy! So, I should tell you that this is my very first guest post EVAH! I feel a little honored. I feel a little nervous. I feel a little mischievous! I’ll be good though.
I thought, that since I’ve had the pleasure of being IN the casa de Dutch Bitch, I would give you a little photo tour of the place. I took a few snapshots on my recent weekend there. I had to be quick. I wasn’t sure how Dutchy would react to my posting photos of her personal space here on the web but ya know, I think I got a few good shots. So without further adieu, here is a glimpse into Dutchy’s personal Bitchtacular Space.
You all know how much of a fashionista Dutchy is right? I mean, shoes and clothing galore! The woman is a powerhouse shopper and I have the evidence. The Dutch Bitch Closet
Regal isn’t it? She downplayed the space but I was amazed. I mean, I thought I was a clothing and shoe whore but seriously, this woman is obsessed! It might be an illness in her case, I’m not sure.
Next we have the Dutch Bitch pantry. I wanted to see what a Dutch Bitch snacks on during those late night MSN chats we have. I figured I’d find the standard chips, popcorn, stroopwaffels, and chocolate bars. I have to admit, I was a bit taken back when I peeked into her pantry.
Of course now this means that if Penelope is reading this post, she’ll be packing her bags and wine glass and bringing her Brit ass to Dutchyland on the next plane! I think there’s enough to share Penelope!
The next stop in our tour is the Dutch Bitch bathroom. I had to be really sneaky in getting this photograph because well, any bitch is going to be super uber private where her bathroom is concerned. I had to act quickly. I mean, it’s a small apartment she lives in..no matter where I turned, she was only just around the corner and I’m sure she was watching me to be sure I wasn’t stealing shoes or something. Did I mention she frisked me when I left?? I can’t tell you how painful it is to hide a pair of stilettos in one’s bra! Oy! Where was I now? Oh yes, the Dutch Bitch bathroom…
That’s her personal hairstylist there. I think she keeps him in the pantry when he’s not styling her hair and making her Dutchtacular. C’mon, you know you hate her as much as I do for having the perfect hair. It’s sickening. I just want to slap her. Wait…did I say that out loud?? I meant to say that I find her an inspiration and I strive to have hair like her’s some day. Good save yeah?
I had to stop taking photos in the apartment. Dutchy was beginning to get suspicious and I was afraid she’d confiscate my camera and take it to her own personal Vindication Zone. What is the Vindication Zone you ask? Well, you know how Dutchy has a bit of road rage right? I have to say, having spent my fair share of time on the highways here in Dutchyland, she is completely justified in her frustrations over ignorant Dutch drivers. You know all of those drivers that have cut her off and been rude to her on the roadways? Yeah, she gets even. This is the Dutch Bitch Junk Yard. All bad drivers have their cars personally destroyed by Dutchy and then she leaves a little personal artwork on them just for aesthetics’ sake.
I think the bright colours are a nice touch. I mean, she’s not completely without heart where these idiot drivers are concerned!
So that’s it. That’s my little photographic tour into the life of a Dutch Bitch. I probably won’t be invited back for anymore girly weekends after this, but you know, I felt it my bloggers duty to give you a little insight into a woman you all seem to admire so much! I’m now off to go put my camera into hiding and see if I can tend to that nasty stiletto wound I have in my left ta ta. Tot Ziens!!
What else did you see you couldn’t shoot? Just spit it out, it’ll do you good to release that
FroggyWoogies last blog post..Mexico invades US
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Great work hon!! You bravely went where no other has gone before!
Damn that’s some wine collection she has there, and yet she tells me she doesn’t drink *much* wine…pffffffftttttt! Hope your boobs recover from the stilettos soon 
Penelopes last blog post..Nose. Joint. Out of.
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Errrrm hello? Where is my picture? I am NOT a head in a sack!!
Penelopes last blog post..Nose. Joint. Out of.
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I wanted to tell you that I’m totally in love with your use of “Bitchtacular” I may walk around just saying it all day.
As for DB’s closet. I’m going to have to come visit y’all and let her take me power-shopping because that is one hell of a closet.
I hope your left ta-ta gets to feeling better. You just need someone to kiss it, imo
Lady Jayes last blog post..Quick and Painless Enneagram Test
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ha.ha.ha.. you almost had me going UNTIL you got to the bathroom… *snort* personal stylist indeed!
Cinnkittys last blog post..Screw YOU Tar-Jay!
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I knew she was a diva, but DAMN!!
Nice job exposing her true self!!
metalmoms last blog post..Today…
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Froggie: My lips are sealed! I’ll never tell!
Penelope: The boob wound has healed. I don’t even think she’s missed the stilettos! And yeah, she likes to portray herself as a minimalist where wine is concerned! Ppppffffftttt AS IF
LJ: I happen to like “bitchtacular” too! I should add it to urban dictionary or sumthin! Yeah, she’s a power shopper indeed! I found a great pair of shoes and the woman snatched ‘em right away from me and bought them! THE NERVE!! And yeah, I’m still looking for volunteers to kiss the ta ta wound!
Kitty: No, seriously. He’s there! In the DutchBitch Salon every day! Javier is his name I think. He spoke very little English which is just the way I like my men!
Metal: I try! I try!
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Did she have an au-natural family photo in the bathroom? Or is that just a British thing?
delmers last blog post..Rethinking Cookies
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pssst. is she really gone?
she is?!!
paaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrteeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! the place looks great, i’ll be over in a few with booze and boys!!
hello haha narfs last blog post..HNT – My 16th Half Nekkid Thursday Is Another Guest
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Love the closet, but didn’t mirrored dressers go out in the 80′s?
Jest sayin’…….
blondefabulouss last blog post..Good News! Get Your Good News Right Here!
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Great post. We will all have to call Dutch Bitch out on her lavish lifestyle next time she’s whining about something.
Ginger Magnolias last blog post..……
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Thank you for confirming what I suspected ALL ALONG!
Morgetrons last blog post.."Every time you stop a school, you will have to build a jail." -Mark Twain
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Delmer: No, I think it was just your normal porn stash in the bathroom.
HHN: Vodka! Lots of Vodka!
Blonde: Well you know how it is in Europe…they’re either way advanced, or they’re behind several years. Ya just never know!
Ginger: Indeed, you will!
Morgetron: It’s been my greatest pleasure!
DutchieStyles last blog post..Pssst… :razz:
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